September is Gone! Where Was I?
WOW! Is September gone already? I have not been doing much of anything since Mom died. It seems like I have just been occupying space going around in a vicious circle. I feel like I am getting things done but actually I have accomplished nothing. Reading very little of the blogs I like, no writing, no posts on my blog of my own for about a month now. I have let things outside of me get the best of me.
I have been working at my J-O-B and how fitting that the project that I am working on is called Zombies. That is the best word to describe me for the past 6 weeks. But I think it goes further back than that.
Since 2007, I have gone from being almost laid off—oh man was that stressful—to a relationship that did not work to depression to anxiety to depression again to mid-life crisis and then just…emptiness.
Back on August 15th, three days after Mom passed, I wrote about Life and what is actually important. Since then I guess I have been trying to find myself. It was an internal struggle, but a struggle I had to experience. Then I came across this quote from George Bernard Shaw, “Life isn’t about finding yourself. It’s about creating yourself.”
Well, it is time for me to get out of my funk. It is time to set my life straight, put my priorities in order and move forward instead of staying stuck in the mud. I may not know where I am going but that does not matter. I know where I have been and I know where I want to go. For now, I will just live in the moment and start creating.
I have started reading a book called The Buddha, Geoff and Me by Edward Canfor-Dumas. A fellow blogger referred this reading and I am finally going to sit down and read it. It is a very interesting book so far. I will let you know how it turns out in a later post.
Here is to creating!
Peace!!!
Hari Qhuang
Love the quote! 😀
I’m looking forward to read your post about that wonderful book you are reading.
Frank
Thank you. That post should be soon. I am just about done reading it.
heartflow2013
Good post, Frank! In some ways I have experienced the same dynamic in my life. My experience is really to take one day at a time and to KNOW that the right thing always shows up at the right time – maybe not according to my mind’s expectation, but always just the right thing (in hindsight ); )
Wishing you much equanimity and peace of mind!
Something from a book I enjoy very much, also available as a PDF:
Make no effort either to work or to renounce; it is your effort which is the bondage. What is destined to happen will happen. If you are destined not to work, work cannot be had even if you hunt for it. If you are destined to work, you will not be able to avoid it and you will be forced to
engage yourself in it. So, leave it to the higher power; you cannot renounce or retain as you choose.
http://www.beasyouare.info/beasyouare.pdf
Tomas ☼
thoughtsalone
Welcome back! In a way we each are the Creator, it’s part of our divine nature. Peace.
Ralph
That’s great Frank. You have taken the first step in realising that you have a problem to solve. If creating is the solution, go for it. Sorry to hear about your Mom. My condolences. Ralph 🙁
Frank
Thanks, Ralph.
Peace!!!
Professor VJ Duke
Nice to see you back, sir!
Frank
Thank you, Professor.
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risinghawk
Create away! I’ll be looking forward to seeing the results 😉 Peace . . .
Frank
Peace to you, my friend.